When it came to writing this post, there couldn’t have been a more appropriate moment than right now, as I recently celebrated ten years of marriage with my boyfriend. Those were ten wonderful years. While our love storey is as conventional or exceptional as any, it earns us a lot of wows due of the sheer amount of years we have been together. And that, with the exception of two years in the middle, our relationship has always been a long-distance affair.
We weren’t even in the same city, let alone on the same continent, when we celebrated our ten-year anniversary as a couple. I sat down to reflect about “us” and all of the years that had passed. In love quotes for boyfriend you will get an even better and more detailed discussion of a loving relationship with my boyfriend.
At some point throughout all of this deliberation, I realised that everything about the previous ten years with him could be boiled down to a single word, a single lesson I’d learned about the importance of commitment in a relationship: commitment.
This may not sound brilliant. However, the reason I’m writing about it is because it seems like a small win, a milestone, a learning and understanding of sorts that can only be enhanced by others’ knowledge and comprehension. I’m also writing about this because someone recently expressed their appreciation for us by stating, “It takes a lot of character to stay devoted.” This made me understand how important the term commitment is, and how much more important it is now.
I don’t want this to be a list of ‘5 things to do to make your relationship succeed’ since every relationship is different and requires a different approach. It is impossible to generalise about how two persons participating in a relationship want their connection to operate. So please understand that what I’m going to say is not relationship advise. It’s me bringing to the surface specific aspects of my relationship that, in hindsight, have strengthened our devotion to one another; to us.
It was not love at first sight. At the very least, not for me (or so I like to believe). However, after six months of friendship and getting to know one another, we made the decision to begin dating. His efforts have resulted in this success. He was relentless in his pursuit of me, and he chased me for a long period. When you really want to be with someone and you have a good feeling that they want to be with you as well, you have to make a commitment to really doing something about it. Don’t be afraid of the “commitment” itself, or of the repercussions, or of the things you may have to alter, or of the things that may change on their own own.
It’s been a while since we’ve gone to McDonald’s together, but I know that whenever we do, he’ll get the chilli sauce with my burger, rather as the standard ketchup that comes with it. Because that’s how I prefer my burger to be cooked. It is this meticulous attention to detail in the tiniest of details that demonstrates a certain level of devotion to making the individual feel special. Make the necessary effort.
There is no relationship that is free of obstacles. Neither was ours, to be honest. This is especially true given that our relationship has always been one of long distance. The obstacles continued coming our way, and we overcame them one at a time by articulating precisely how we were feeling, making an effort to meet each other, and, most importantly, by trusting one other. Nothing else compares to trust as a demonstration of devotion and character.
Sacrifice is synonymous with dedication, yet the word has a negative connotation since that is the emotion that our age identifies with the word in this context. I’m not suggesting that you give up anything you enjoy for the sake of the relationship. You are under no need to do so, and your partner will understand, perhaps with some reluctance at first. Make compromises, though, because they are not nearly as vital as the connection in the grand scheme of things in the long run. As if no one else has told you this already, allow me to say it on your behalf: when you commit to a relationship, you commit to (fairly) making sacrifices in order to maintain that commitment.
Finally, no relationship is ever complete until there is love present, which necessitates your whole and total devotion. Do activities and use words that communicate love in the most unexpected of circumstances and watch the delight unfold. We all want reassurance from time to time, sometimes more frequently than we realise. If you’re feeling anything, express it and demonstrate it.
Preventing a Heart Attack
I get a lot of calls from folks who are dealing with the pain of a shattered heart. Some of my most read blogs are about getting over a broken heart. Although not every broken heart can be prevented, the answers to the two questions I was asked above suggest techniques to keep yourself safe. Don’t rush in too quickly, and be on the lookout for surprises.
Relationship decisions are really important. Perhaps this is the reason why I receive so many inquiries about them. Consequently, I would always advise you to pray about any new relationship you are considering, especially if you have any reservations. Inquire of God to see whether this is what he truly wishes for you.
In the event that any of you lacks wisdom, you should turn to God, who gives abundantly to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. James 1:5 (NASB)